Nov 182014
 

Oh, Asia, you’re great. Really. You gave us “Gangnam Style,” vending machines with panties in them, and those adorable and not-at-all-horrifying creatures with TVs inside of their stomachs (TVtummies? TeleBellies?). You’re a nutty, wonderful country. OK, I’m being told that “Asia” is not a country. That’s crazy talk. That’s like saying Europe or Africa isn’t [……]

Oct 282014
 

Ah, Halloween! The one day of the year when you can justify running out into the streets completely naked by calling it a costume. Uh…hypothetically. I wouldn’t know anything about being nude in Copenhagen’s main square on October 31 of last year. That’s slander and lies. Or, as the police records refer to it, “indecent [……]

Oct 242014
 

Have you heard the big news? Renee Zellweger has a new face! Seemingly overnight, Renee Zellweger went from looking like this: To looking like this: I know! First Ukraine, then ISIS, then Ebola, now this?! What is the world coming to? Understandably, there’s been a lot of confusion as to what Renee Zellweger’s transformation means [……]

Oct 192014
 

Aaaah, spam commenters. You bring me joy. You write weird things. You make little sense. You give me a reason to visit the Akismet folder where all of you reside and click the “Empty Spam” button. Lately, there are hundreds of you on a daily basis. More work for Akismet, more blog fodder for me. [……]

Oct 102014
 

I’ve recently returned from a previously unannounced trip to Czech Republic, where we attended a family wedding. It went well. Alcohol was consumed, food was eaten, words were exchanged, fun was had. I managed to avoid embarrassing myself in public by walking into glass or fainting. So, all in all, a success. Now I’m back, [……]

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