In late October I have enlightened you all about the cancer-fighting month of Movember. This was the first year I participated in this worldwide phenomenon. I don’t know whether I will continue abusing my poor face in this manner on a yearly basis, but considering my capacity for making poor decisions there’s a good chance I might.
All in all, it’s been a fun month, as depressing as it was to see myself gradually turn into a one-tenth werewolf. I want to recap on some of the observations and learnings that my participation in Movember has brought about. These are:
My colleagues and friends don’t hate me as much as I expected.
Despite hearing a few half-hearted jokes about my new look, most reactions have been overwhelmingly positive. People understood that I was doing this for a good cause. Even though my facial hair startled and scared them daily they have put on their brave faces and offered words of support and encouragement.
So my thanks go out to everyone who suffered with me through these tough and hairy times. A special thanks to my girlfriend who had not only resigned herself to the cruel fate, but also actively photo-documented the disaster that was my moustachioed face.
There are a total of about four moustache-related references out there.
Having acquired a visible moustache half way into Movember I braced myself for all sorts of jokes about my look. I discovered, with a degree of disappointment, that there aren’t “all sorts of jokes” about moustaches. There are more like “four sorts of jokes”. I’ve heard a few Borat references, two Tom Sellecks, one Burt Reynolds and about ten times I have been compared to the dudes from Beastie Boys’ “Sabotage”.
This scarcity of moustache humour is either due to a very limited number of famous moustache-wearing celebrities, or basic human instinct to repress images of hairy-faced men. Either way, the tenth time someone mentioned “Sabotage” I took out a boom-box, put on the song, cranked the volume to the max, grabbed a gun and started chasing the person around the office while yelling “I can’t stand it, I know you planned it!”. Well, I didn’t actually do any of that, but now I think of it as a missed opportunity.
Some people are quitters
In my first post about Movember I have mentioned a colleague that essentially single-handedly pressured me into participating. His arguments were convincing, the “it’s for charity” guilt-trip strategy was effective and his apparent commitment to the cause was admirable. I said “alright, oh great Movember messiah, lead the way and I shall follow!”. And lead the way he did…
…for about two weeks. One day he came into the office and I couldn’t help but notice that something about his moustache was off. Namely, his moustache was off! Not wanting to rely on my deceiving eyes, I had to solicit a verbal confirmation of this clearly impossible turn of events. I turned to my colleague and very politely said the following:
“Top of the morning to you, good sir! Now, have I and my trusty eyes gone insane, or is the amount of hair on your face insufficient to be qualified as a moustache?”.
What I certainly did not say was “what the fuck, dude?!”, but you may hear witness accounts that claim otherwise. My colleague admitted to having shaved off his moustache, but he really had one hell of a good excuse: he discovered that a moustaches itches, which I think we can all agree is the kind of torture no man should go through, Movember or not. Also, his girlfriend didn’t like the way it looked, a revelation that shocked absolutely no one.
And thus, in a cruel twist, my former Movember idol has crashed and burned only half way through the month. If this should teach us anything at all it’s that we cannot rely on others to always lead the way. Also, “what the fuck, dude”?!
People are more than willing to support a good cause
Over the course of the month I have been posting updated pictures of my face to Facebook, which is quite possibly the most “on the nose” use of Facebook. I did this to see exactly how many people I could get to “unfriend” me in the course of one month, but also to encourage donations to the fight against prostate cancer.
All I can say is…it worked! In the course of one month my face has collected over 2,000 DKK (or 400 “real money”, as American visitors will undoubtedly refer to it). Colleagues, friends, secret admirers and creepy stalkers have all chipped in. It’s great to discover that so many people are willing to support a good cause when given the chance.
I am incredibly thankful to everyone who donated! You have all made a difference in the fight against prostate cancer. Even more importantly, you made me feel better about having mutilated my face for one whole month…
A few days ago Katka has spent some time on photoshopping my face onto various backgrounds of remote places. This means she had to tolerate the evolution of my hideous moustache twice – once in real life and once again in the many photos she had to look through and edit. This sort of dedication is truly commendable. Well done, Mo Sista! Thank you!
Today I chained these photoshopped pictures of my world-travelling face together into a short video collage.
Before you watch it, SPOILER ALERT: My face will haunt you in your nightmares! Enjoy!