People often wonder: What does it mean, exactly, when we say “go off on a tangent”?
The thing is, it’s kind of hard to define.
First of all, words are tricky. Like, when we say “stable,” we can mean anything from “structurally sound” to “unchanging” to “the place where horses live.” Plus horses are funny animals. Not necessarily “haha” funny, but, you know, curious. Long faces, hooves, manes—many weird elements.
Although they’re not as strange as, say, elephants. Did you know that elephants are allegedly the only animals that can’t jump? Which is bullshit, of course, because sloths and some others can’t jump either.
I once had a friend who’d quote this type of trivia all the time, but he’d never think to question or research it for himself. I don’t get it. Wouldn’t you want to at least verify the claim? Check a few reputable sources? It’s like you’d rather keep repeating total bullshit than learn the facts! Is that it? Is that what you want, Peter?!
That kind of stuff really makes me angry sometimes! No, dozens of people didn’t OD on marijuana, nor is Justin Bieber legally prohibited from making music. Both stories are from The Daily Currant, which does satire. It’s right there on their “About” page, a few quick clicks away.
Thirdly, learn to count. They say math isn’t important, but it’s everywhere around us. Without math, we wouldn’t have numbers and equations. Respect your teachers, kids. Then again, you should generally respect people, even if they’re not like you—women, gays, other races, ignorant weirdos who wear hats. All of them deserve your respect and, in the case of hat-wearing weirdos, pity.
In closing, I think we can all become better at playing instruments, tap dancing, and communicating clearly, concisely, and in an easy-to-follow manner. Thank you.
Wait… Are you saying that everything I read on the internets isn’t true?! What is this world coming to?!
Hugs!
Valerie
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I am not sure, but I don’t think I want to be a part of it. Well, expect having a blog and reading things online, and the Facebooks and the Twitters.
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Damn! I thought the Justin Bieber one had to be true….
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If we wish for it with all out heart, it just might! Reach for the stars!
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Well said, Daniel. It’s important to verify our claims and assertions. Except the one about the tooth fairy – I find that such a comfort!
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Tooth fairies are much like Santa Claus – real and historical figures.
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I can see why someone would choose to believe that Justin Bieber has been legally prohibited from making music without verification. It’s such a beautiful dream, you know? Why risk the chance that it might die?
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I know. Sometimes it’s just better to believe. Who cares about facts?! Let’s all collectively wish for this dream one day coming true.
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I came by earlier today and left a brilliant comment. It was exceptional, perhaps the most witty comment I’ve ever made.
As I hit the post comment button, my internet connection failed. My internet connection is as speckled as a chocolate Easter egg except not near as tasty.
My comment had some allusion to the connection between hooves and hats but to reproduce this hilarity is beyond my mental capacity at the end of a work day.
Woulda, coulda, shoulda.
You do tangents well. It’s like most of the conversations I have on a near daily basis.
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What a shame! Shame is an important emotion, since it can drive our change for the better. I don’t have a driver’s license, though, so it’s kind of difficult for me to drive a car.
Cars can be dangerous, so watch out on the road. “Road to Perdition” was a curious movie.
Thank you!
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I think you lost your centripetal force.
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Assuming I’ve ever had it to begin with.
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So, horses are weird, sloths can’t jump, and Bieber can still legally assault our ears. Got it. Your tangents are very informative.
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You captured the essence of this post beautifully. Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder, but eyes are prone to deceit. That’s why I don’t trust politicians anymore.
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Someone OD’ed on Mary Jane? REALLY? That’s a bit far fetched… must have had some other medical issue… or were they stoned when the freight train hit them?
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There’s actually a very simple explanation: Abraham Lincoln came back from the dead and attacked those people with his fire-breathing powers, acquired from an ancient spirit of a dead alien from the future. But the press doesn’t want you to know the truth.
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