10 new ways the world can be “deeply concerned”

Throughout the Ukraine–Russia conflict, many countries and leaders have spoken out against Putin’s aggression. US, EU, and others have employed the full range of powerful diplomatic and economic tools at their disposal, from sanctioning a few people to sanctioning a few dozen people.

And yet, during all this time, they have only managed to express their emotions in a very limited way. They started out with “deeply concerned,” which later culminated into…well, “deeply concerned”:

February 28: Obama Remarks: ‘Deeply Concerned’ by Reports of Russian Moves in Ukraine

March 20: U.N. chief Ban tells Putin he is ‘deeply concerned’ over Ukraine

April 15: Turkey ‘deeply concerned’ over events in Ukraine

May 31: UN deeply concerned about incidents with OSCE monitors in east Ukraine

June 14: OSCE Chairperson-in-Office deeply concerned about today’s escalation of tension in Ukraine

Now look. I don’t mean to be hating on the phrase “deeply concerned”. I like “deeply concerned” as much as the next guy (that bastard). It’s a perfectly fine way to express concern that is deep in nature. It’s short and to the point. It’s everything a phrase should be when one wants to communicate a deep level of concern about something.

Having said that, wouldn’t you want to change it up a bit? Huh, world? Isn’t the English language rich enough to produce something other than “deeply concerned”? I think so. So, as an amateur writer and a professional worrier, allow me to offer a few useful alternative ways to express your feelings:

10. The US is somberly shaking its metaphorical head over events in Eastern Ukraine

9. Yesterday Prime Minister of Japan summed up his feelings with a haiku:

“Much loss in Ukraine,
Melancholy overflows,
I fight the anguish.”

8. Canada calls the situation in Ukraine “utter kerfuffle”

7. Multiple monocles are missing after the UK parliament collectively gasped at Ukrainian developments

6. UN calls the recent crisis in Ukraine “moderately tear-jerking”

5. Following news from Ukraine, EU give their level of worry a “9 out of 10 ”

4. When it comes to Ukraine, OSCE are not happy, not very happy at all

3. China likens Ukraine to a depressed panda lost in the wild

2. When asked about Ukraine, Angela Merkel let out a prolonged, meaningful, and tragic sigh

1. David Cameron on Ukraine: “Shite!”

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16 thoughts on “10 new ways the world can be “deeply concerned”

  1. This is a terrific bit of writing! Even though the topic is, uh, “deeply concerning,” I enjoyed reading your lighthearted jab at “those phrases.” I get irked when the press overuses a perfectly good word or phrase. Thanks for calling them out on it in such a delightful way! I’m glad to have discovered your blog (clicked over from Yeah Write) !

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  2. This is such a great post that fellow writers (like me) are deeply concerned that we will be shown to be inferior in comparison.

    Love the haiku, and the UK monocles!

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  3. You knocked it out of the park with this one. (Okay- you knock it out with every post but I have to use some cliched metaphor or you’d wonder what happened to my commenting system.)

    You are just damn funny. Period. I completely get- ‘amateur writer and a professional worrier’ because that’s what I am. But I think you can go ahead and put yourself in the professional writer category. I’d buy your writing in a heartbeat!

    I’m deeply concerned that the world is horribly underwhelmed with ways to express their deep concern. Clearly our world leaders need to read this post!

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  4. It’s difficult to laugh at such a grave situation, but you have a knack for making us do so while still expressing the serious subtext behind the words. I love the Haiku one. In fact, if our leaders expressed themselves in Haiku more, this world might be a little less ugly.

    Like

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