We’ve all met an extremely clingy person at some point in our lives. You’ve gone on a date that you didn’t quite enjoy, while the other party fell in love with everything about you. Your next phone conversation was awkward. You tried to gently convey to the other person that, maybe, the two of you should never meet under any circumstances ever again, while they demanded to know exactly which part of their maniacal infatuation you failed to find endearing. Then they boiled your pet lizard and punched your favorite flower in the…uh…petals? That’s just how life goes.
Sound familiar? Ever wonder what the company vs. customer version of that dynamic would sound like? No you haven’t, but here we are anyways.
Ryan Block and his wife tried to cancel their Internet service with Comcast. Now, it’s not uncommon for companies to have “customer retention” reps who try to steer you into keeping the service or at least downgrading to a cheaper one, instead of canceling outright. What’s somewhat less common is having those reps verbally terrorize you for twenty minutes, passive-aggressively demanding to know what they have done wrong and swearing they can change if only you gave them a second chance.
But Comcast went where none have gone before. The Comcast rep kept Ryan on the line for what must have felt like an eternity. The rep kept asking Ryan why he wanted to change. Over and over again. He. Would. Not. Take. No. For an answer.
Luckily for us, instead of finding out where the Comcast rep lived, sneaking into his house, and strangling him with a phone cord, Ryan recorded the conversation and uploaded it to SoundCloud. He only recorded the last eight minutes of the conversation, but trust me, it’s more than enough for you to question the Comcast rep’s sanity and your own will to live. Enjoy: