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Guest Expressed: “Only Slightly Infuriating”

Today I have the pleasure to welcome Jeff of Content Unrelated as a guest.

Jeff’s a really funny guy and if you don’t know him…now you do! If you ever need a mood lifter, check out his “Horrorscopes” series.

I sometimes get tired of bitching about stuff that I find annoying, so today I’ll let Jeff do the bitching for me. Enter Jeff:

Let me first get the formalities out of the way. Thanks for the guest spot on Nest-Expressed, Daniel. I hope you enjoyed your blog because having me here could be the beginning of the end.

To Daniel’s readers; if this works out, you’ll probably be seeing more collaborations between the two of us. Buckle up, folks.

That said, let me tell you a little bit about myself:

LIKES:
Mac&Cheese
Death Metal
Naps

DISLIKES:
The Sun
Doing stuff
Stupid, common grammar mistakes

Yeah. I’m one of those people. You know the type. I’m the person whose blood gets a little heated when he sees a they’re instead of a there or a their. It drives me completely batshit to see a your when a sloth with an extra chromosome could clearly see it should’ve been a you’re.

Go ahead, tell me about how you’re going too the store. I dare you.

I’ve killed for less.

Chrome, Google’s Web browser, has this wonderfully handy little feature that underlines in red the words you’ve misspelled as you’re typing. In green, it underlines words that, it believes, you aren’t using properly. For example, if you were to type, “Where did you come form?” it underlines the form, at which point you can right-click, and it’ll tell you, Hey, bro, you used that word improperly. Want me to fix it?

Good Guy Chrome.

Until it totally tried to troll me the other day.

So I was doing my thing and writing angry, pointless things on the Internet. A typical Saturday night. After reviewing my post, I’d noticed something odd. A word I’d clearly used correctly was throwing a green underline by Chrome.

a-lot

Thinking Chrome was clearly on drugs, I deleted and re-typed. Still underlined. When I right-clicked to see what business Chrome had underlining my shit, it showed me this:

Alot
Come on, Google. Don’t screw with me. It’s not a particularly huge deal, it’s only slightly infuriating. I mean, if you’re going to serve my search results to the NSA on a silver platter, the least you could do is not screw with the people who wouldn’t actually know any better.

Now, I comb through this post to find any errors, lest I make a complete ass of myself making a stupid mistake after spending an entire post bitching about them.