It’s time for the third instalment of Nest Digest.

In this segment I share stories that have made front page news of Danish newspapers and then question their relevance along with my sanity.

Unlike the previous stories that focused on bad news, this one is actually sunny and shiny. Literally. Behold:

Translation: The hottest day in 6 months

See, at first glance this is a nice piece of positive news. Why not let people know when something unexpected like this happens! The hottest day in six whole months! Wow, quite an achievement.

Then I got to thinking, which is something I like to do every now and then, if there’s nothing good on TV. What I came up with is this: six months ago we were in the middle of November. Digging further into this web of puzzles I concluded that in between the middle of November and the middle of April lies a season called winter, aka the coldest season of the year.

“Could it be that mid-April having the first hot day of the period from mid-November is pretty much exactly what one would expect on any given year?” I asked the mouse pad on my desk. No answer was forthcoming. That’s when I employed an advanced journalistic research technique called “Googling it”.

After what felt like whole seconds, I managed to find this graph of Copenhagen average monthly temperatures from Weather.com:

Summer hot. Winter cold. Use brain good.

An observant reader will notice that April is, on average, hotter than any other month that lies between November and March.

I don’t mean to keep picking on MetroXpress, but for fuck’s sake, guys. Did you really just use up most of your front page to bring us the shocking news that seasons are functioning the way they are supposed to?

Whatever. I guess I’ll be looking forward to tomorrow’s front page article, titled “The first Wednesday of this week is here at last!”