In a distant past (like one year ago) I started hearing hushed rumours about something called Movember. Then I noticed a few of my friends on Facebook posting Movember-related status updates and pictures of their moustaches. I figured they were in some sort of secret upper-lip-hair-fetishist cult. I also figured they kinda sucked at the whole “secret” thing, what with Facebook posts and all. That was the end of it. Until yesterday.

Yesterday the talk of Movember started yet again, this time at work. A colleague of mine is apparently well-versed in all things Movember and will be joining the Movember movement this year. By the way, the name “Movember” is an incredibly clever portmanteau of “November” and “Moustache” (it’s mind-boggling, really).

So, what is this mysterious yet so-very-catchy-sounding happening all about? Well, in short, it’s this: men around the globe shave their faces right before November 1st and then let their moustaches grow up until November 30th. They do so for a number of reasons:

All the cool guys do it!

• Growing a moustache is universally considered manly, sexy and irresistible. This applies if you’re living in the 1970s and/or are a member of the aforementioned and non-existent (I pray) upper-lip-hair-fetishist cult.
• It gives men ample opportunity to compete for the title of “The Best Tom Selleck Clone”.
• Movember helps raise awareness of and encourage donations for fighting men’s health issues, particularly prostate cancer.

As you may have guessed, only one of the above reasons is actually true and it’s pretty easy to discern which one it is (hint: Tom Selleck). You can read more about the cause on the official website or (you knew this was coming) on Wikipedia. Just one day ago I knew almost nothing about Movember and had absolutely no intention of participating. However, after some pressure from the colleague I’ve done a bit of research and put some thought into the matter. Here are the “for” and “against” points I could think of on such short notice.

FOR:

• It’s a freaking moustache! No matter how hard I try I just can’t imagine myself with a moustache. Sure, many others can pull it off quite well, but me? This is how my very awesome facial hair is arranged today:

I know, it’s awesome!

If I go by Movember rules I’ll have to lose the goatee and to let the uber-well-trimmed upper-lip part grow into a bushy mess. Who knows what the end result will be? Do you? If you do, please contact me immediately to spare us all the gruesome aftermath!

• No facial hair to begin with. I haven’t had a clean-shaven face for almost ten years. The Movember rules dictate that you start on November 1st with no facial hair at all, to even out the playing field for all participants. So this means I’ll have to finally get a clean shave and discover what’s lurking beneath all of that hair. Who knows what that may be? Do you? If you do, please contact me immediately to spare us all the gruesome discovery!
• Subject of ridicule. Nothing encourages snide remarks and “friendly jabs” like a sudden change to one’s look. In my case the remarks are likely to begin with variations of “what’s with the baby face” (November 1st) and end with something like “nice moustache, Borat” (November 30th).

Just as I was weighing the pros and cons of this decision I got involved in a Facebook conversation with two colleagues, who were now working in unison to convince me to join. About twenty seconds of this peer pressure did what hours of contemplation couldn’t. Peer pressure has powers, man!

And thus, after an unreasonably short period of consideration, as is the case with all of my worst life decision, I am joining the Movember cause. I now have a profile, or a so-called “Mospace” (as we’ve already learned the Movember crowd are masters of puns), and it can be found here: http://mobro.co/Nest. If you feel like spreading the word or even supporting the cause financially (you big spender!), I’ll be most grateful (but prostate cancer won’t be).

Keep your eyes open for more Movember-related posts and updates during the month of…*sigh*…Movember. Until then there’s nothing “mo” to say (looks like this corny word play stuff is contagious).

EDIT: Here’s how it all turned out.