There’s nothing better than a relaxing dinner on a late Friday.
You open a bottle of white wine, light a few candles, put on some calm background music and dig into a delicious tuna eye.
Wait, what was that last part again? Tuna eye? Is that code for something? Is that the name of a strange children’s game? Is it Popeye’s eccentric cousin who always smells of fish?
Clearly we can’t literally be talking about a tuna eyeball, right? Right?!
OK, so we’re literally talking about a tuna eyeball.
Yup, what to most of us is an eerie disembodied entity that occasionally appears in our nightmares, to some is a nice juicy snack.
But let’s not get too judgemental yet. Sometimes a dish sounds horrifying on paper, but when you see it, it’s actually not that…
…OK let’s get judgemental.
If you stretch your imagination, they almost look like mushrooms, if mushrooms were made out of unspeakable horror and screams of agony.
Look at them! They’re just ominously lying there, staring at you, judging you.
If I know my audience, a good chunk of you are now wondering whether there’s a home recipe for this awesome (awful?) tuna eye dish.
Good news, you goddamn creeps, there is. Now get away from me.
I especially like this part of the intro to the recipe:
“…tuna eye should not be eaten raw and needs to be lightly cooked.”
Thanks for that unnecessary qualifier, psycho chef, but you had me at “tuna eye should not be eaten”.
12 thoughts on “WTF Report: “Tuna Eye””
I’ve always said never trust anything that doesn’t blink, and I think I’ll be giving this dish a wide birth – (oh no, that’s triggered images of afterbirth …)
But are you SURE it doesn’t blink?! What if it does? WHAT IF IT DOES?!
I once found a spine bone whilst eating canned salmon… I still, to this day, cannot look at a can of fish without getting the dry heaves. This is so much worse.
So. Much. Worse.
I am an over-achiever, that’s all I can say. Enjoy new nightmares!
Thanks for that! I hope I can tuna that image out. 😛
I wish I cod help you, but eye just can’t!
As someone who feels consistently guilty for eating other living animals, it seems respectful to at least eat the whole animal if you’re gonna kill it.
Yep- I’m a hypocrite…. I ain’t eating no tuna eye. It does make me wonder though if that black, glossy thin stuff in every can of tuna I’ve ever opened is actually eyeball.
Thanks for raising that valid question. I shall never eat canned tuna again!
When I first saw that picture, I thought it was a dish someone made on Halloween for fun. I assumed those were mushrooms. So you’re telling me this is not a Halloween-themed dish but actual tuna eyeballs that people eat for real? Right. There goes lunch…
This is one of those occasions where you’d really wish you were wrong!
Enjoy that non-existent lunch!
That is a pretty accurate assessment!